Excerpt from Gwen J. Broude “Boys will be boys – psychology“. COPYRIGHT 1999 The National Affairs, Inc.
Gurian (The Wonder of Boys and A Fine Young Man) warns that boys are, by nature, actually more fragile than girls and less able to withstand a hostile world. Evolved over the millennia to be hunters, not lovers or nurturers, males are less capable of emotion and of forming deep personal relationships without persistent tutoring. We should not be lulled into the illusion that boys have it made or, as feminists have claimed, that this culture is run by, and made for, males. Men who, as adults, are preoccupied with the pursuit of money, status, or some other real or illusory power, are only trying to fill the empty void inside themselves that is the result of our cruel demands that a little boy should just shape up and “take it like a man.”
Sex differences appear to be a fact of life. They persist over time and across cultures. It is always possible that all cultures are sexist, and in precisely the same way. But to many observers of human behavior, this cross-cultural uniformity is taken to say something about human nature. Furthermore, the striking similarity between the sex-linked behavior of humans and other primates is prima facie evidence that human sex differences cannot be a function of culture alone.
The maxim that “boys will be boys” reflects this reality. Extreme sex-linked behavioral problems, such as disruptive aggression in males, can cause trouble, and clearly there is wisdom in wishing to clamp down on such behavioral abnormalities. But there is only so much that parents and others can do to influence the behavior of children. The boy advocates, who are disturbed by the differences between males and females, want to persuade us that normal male traits are personality disorders. This is clearly wrong. We should acknowledge that the sexes are different and work with what nature has provided.
Once upon a time, as feminists say, society viewed the feminine traits of nurturing, dependence, compliance, and emotional expressiveness as not only different from but inferior to masculine traits. Now it is the boys who are disadvantaged. When we find differences between males and females in how they meet life’s opportunities and challenges, why can’t we simply accept them as differences and make the necessary accommodations ?
Photos: Styled by Anastasia Barbieri, actor and model Jamie Dornan reveals fashion’s grittier side in an editorial from Vogue Hommes International. Photographed by Cédric Buchet. From The Fashionisto.
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